Tag Archive | dreams

Dream Fury

I’m not really here, I’m really writing NaNoWriMo, but for some reason, my dreams at night are running rampant, so I thought I’d share them!


I woke up so furious from a dream, I felt as though my blood were boiling. For some reason I was back in [that other place], and offering to do an arts and crafts workshop on pens! I packed all my various sets of pens and laid them out to show a certain person who once ran the children’s group despite her own child having grown up years ago (who shall remain nameless), and she vetoed the whole thing, and said it wasn’t ‘viable’. So I packed my pens angrily away into my holdall, saying “don’t worry, I was just thinking of doing it in somebody’s home, I’ll organise it myself.” But she started saying something along the lines of that being quite impossible (as though she controlled what went on in other people’s homes!) I packed even more angrily, and she accused me of stealing some cardboard or wooden crap of her own, which I hadn’t done, I just moved it out of my way, which I told her and said it was ridiculous, why on earth would I want to steal her rubbish? So then I stormed out (storm in a teacup, remember? Bitches!) and I stormed through the market, bumping into everybody. Everybody seemed to be wearing black, and I think I was wearing a big black cloak with a hood. I wonder what on earth prompted that, after so many years.

A second dream, I was somewhere up north, I don’t know what I was doing but have a feeling I was in a hospital for some reason. Husband was supposed to be coming to meet me but he kept sending messages saying he was delayed, so I decided to drive myself. Another girl persuaded me to take her with me, and she was supposed to be going to Nottingham, but she didn’t want to go home, so we decided to just abscond together, no idea where we were going. Strange, eh?

And there was another (I think these dreams are actually in reverse order). This one may well have been set in a hospital, it was definitely some kind of institutional building, and as usual, I was on the run, rushing through the building trying to escape and eventually I hid in somebody’s bed, but we were discovered, and we rolled off the bed on to the floor and both started running again.

That last one seems to be my typical dream format. I’m always on the run or being pursued, I have no idea why.

Perhaps I’m just crazy enough to be a writer?

Crazy Sci-fi Dream

A crazy dream this time!

In the dream, I seemed to be walking carrying a clipboard along a city street through a market with stalls, behind which the people selling had parked their caravans. Every now and then, I would pop inside one of the caravans and ask if everyone was alright.

Finally, I came to a caravan and when I asked if everyone was alright, one of the women was alarmed because – she said – people were disappearing, and she didn’t know where her husband was. She gave me her phone and asked me to wait for a call about a birthday party and tell the caller that she would be there, and then she went off looking for her husband.

Somebody else came in with diving goggles, saying that the last time he’d been seen, he had been wearing these (I didn’t question this!!). I said, they are probably infected and now you have brought it back here to us, we are probably infected too.

Then the call came, and the caller projected himself out of the phone holographically. I told him that the woman said she would be at the party, but I thought that it wasn’t a good idea as it looked as though they were infected with the new plague. He immediately jumped back into the phone and disappeared. As he did so, the phone fizzed and crackled luminous green.

The new person (can’t recall if male or female) pointed at me and said, look! You’re infected. I looked in the mirror and could see a kind of luminous green worm thing in my hair, but when I tried to get hold of it to remove it, my fingers missed it, as though it was not in the same time frame as the rest of us. (That is the obvious conclusion, right?)

Next, I was suited up in a plastic yellow suit, boots and hood, walking through the sewers with some other scientists and testing everywhere for the infection with a little yellow scanner. I said that the only place that is immune is under the water line of the sewage. Everything above that is infected. So the only way we can counteract it is to go under….

…..Ugh! But then the phone rang and woke me up, so I can’t tell if the plague of luminous green time worms is beaten by covering everything in sewage. O_O

I guess we will never know!

Strange Dream Report: Letting Myself In…

I know I have been having lots of weird and wonderful dreams, but somehow they have just been disappearing on me and I have forgotten them as soon as I get up.

But this time I remembered one, so here it is.

I was with my kids in a place I didn’t recognise, and we let ourselves in a door to find what looked like a high quality holiday apartment with lots of double beds, so it was obviously designed for a lot of people, but apparently a bunch of unrelated people were living there, as each open-plan room looked differently decorated.

The beds were made but otherwise some of the rooms were quite untidy, with clothes and scraps of bedlinen on the floor. It seemed that somebody had ordered material and made their own duvet cover, but not finished the job.

I expressed my disgust that people living in such a nice place would leave it so untidy. So we moved next door to what appeared to be our own apartment. That was also untidy, but it wasn’t a luxury apartment, it was quite plain.

Then we went out walking, to go and meet my mum. We appeared to be in a town that was a strange mixture of the seaside and Milton Keynes, with several of the ‘grid squares’ being completely filled with water like man-made lakes, with boats and ships anchored there. (Actually, come to think about it, it reminds me of Stockholm as well.)

I remarked that I would love to stop and investigate one of the water grid-squares some time.

As we walked, I was worried about walking so far and making myself ill, and at the same time I became more and more desperate to go to the toilet, and so we stopped off again and let ourselves into another apartment. We looked around and realised it was very tiny, and downstairs there was just one room – an open plan living room/ kitchen with a shower cubicle and an upstairs.

I went upstairs to find the toilet, and when I opened the door, the first thing I noticed was that the floor was untidy, with shoes strewn about, and then I realised there was a man asleep there, with a little boy beside him. He woke up and asked me what I was doing there.

I explained that we let ourselves in, and that we needed the toilet. And then he did a very strange thing. He said, “I’m just going to go to the forest, I need to get something”, and he left the little boy with me!

I looked around and realised that my kids were a lot younger than they are now in real life,with the eldest perhaps the age that my youngest is now, and the little boy was about three. I realised that I couldn’t possibly leave the boy alone so we would have to wait until his father got back.

So we settled down to do some drawing with paper and crayons with the little boy, and waited.

(And then I woke up because I really did need the toilet!)

I find it very strange that I dreamt again about letting myself into somebody else’s home! What is that about?! Is it just nosiness, or jealousy, or dissatisfaction with our current living arrangements?

It’s also the second dream that featured somebody wanting to leave an unknown child with me.

I quite liked the place though and I want to go there!

What do you make of it?

Star Trek Mysteries


OK, OK, I know I said that I would be posting my Star Trek posts over on The Bajoran Exile, but I had a dream! My first Star Trek TOS dream!

In my dream, the filming of Star trek, the original series, was being used as a cover for a jewel theft, in which Gene Roddenberry was the victim.

The thieves found that the jewels were no ordinary jewels, however, but granted the bearer invisibility and so the jewels themselves were being used to cover up a series of other jewel thefts and of murders!

It was all very stylish, with everybody wearing classic 1960s costumes.

There was a theft and murder at a country house, followed by another foiled attempt in which the thieves (who were part of the TOS crew – possibly red shirts) attempted to go back to Roddenberry’s house to see what else they could steal but they were apprehended.

Rather than call the police or bring them to justice, the lady of the house – Majel Barrett – persuaded the thieves to give up the invisibility jewels to her! (She had smacked them over the head with a frying pan in the dark, so had not realised they were invisible until afterwards!)

After this point, the thefts were to be carried out under Majel’s direction. What she didn’t realise though is that the jewels were cursed, and everybody who had anything to do with them were bound to come to no good. The thieves themselves were found dead before any more thefts could be arranged.

And then so finally, a plan was hatched between the members of the cast to safely dispose of the jewels, which involved a relay of people across a body of water (surreptitiously delivering one invisible member at a time) but, in the end, William Shatner decided (having charmed the jewels out from under Majel while Gene was away) that it was his responsibility to take the invisibility jewels out of harm’s way, and THIS was why Star Trek’s Five Year Mission was cancelled too soon.


I think the analysis for this is simple – too much television over the holidays – a mixture of Warehouse 13, Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries and Star Trek, obviously. I’m supposed to be writing crime/ murder mystery for Jano2016, but I don’t know, what do you think, is there a book in it?! 🙂


What’s it all about? #DreamWeirdness

I discovered the other day that intense and strange dreams are actually a recognised symptom of ME, something to do with hyperventilation because the oxygen doesn’t get to our cells properly. Anyway, that may explain why my dreams are always so vivid, and so memorable (to me anyway).

In my dream, we let ourselves sneakily into our wealthy friends, Derek & Jane’s massive house (not the house they really in but rather some kind of classic mansion, with oak panelling everywhere) this would be the perfect size for us, I remarked.

Derek & Jane turn up unexpectedly and are shocked to see us there, and we tell them that we are there to meet Tom (their eldest son). They rush off, believing our story, taking some other wealthy people’s children to swimming lessons at a private pool. Everything seems to look like 1930s, something out of a Poirot episode. The swimmers are in special life-saving costumes.

I went in a downstairs toilet, there was a big dog lying with its face under a stool or something. It had such long, red fur I thought it was a girl. It’s asleep and doesn’t stir.

Later, I am wandering round a bigger building, perhaps a school, attached to the house. People are milling around. I see someone I recognise and realise I know her from a scrapbooking group, but then I realise it can’t be that, because the scrapbooking group was in the city. it must be something else like that. We talk and walk together, but then I suddenly realise I am completely naked!

I run back to the house looking for the bathroom or somewhere where I can find clothes or something to cover myself. There are people there! Have I gone in the wrong house? People I don’t know, cooking in the kitchen. I panic when suddenly I see my friend Nathalie who pulls me into another room (to protect my modesty!) She tells me it will be alright and that the people cooking would like my help.

We have dinner, the other people have gone, and I look for a sink to wash the dishes. There are sinks everywhere! But they’re all full of strange things. I finally find an empty sink when somebody comes in the front door, a lady with a little boy. She goes in to the toilet without stopping to speak to us.

Now (as is the way in dreams) it has changed to John and Gay’s house (but not the house I remember). I tell the lady they are out and then as she turns I realise she is heavily pregnant. I ask her when she is due, and she says soon, and then realises she is going in to labour. I wave over the neighbours. I say the boy can’t stay with us as he doesn’t know us. She is in a panic, and I think to myself that her anxiety reminds me of me, but the neighbours arrange everything and take them away.

Why? What’s it all about? Lots of my dreams feature pregnancy and babies, random people I know, houses I know. And peculiarly, sinks, toilets and bathrooms feature heavily.

Is it all nonsense? Do I need therapy?!

Dark Room Dream

I thought I would share my dream weirdness before I fall back to sleep and forget it.

I was in a dark room with some other people, at least two men I didn’t recognise, and somebody I knew but I can’t remember who. I was dressed in a black Victorian costume, they seemed to be old cowboys and spoke in Wild West accents.

Hanging on the wall was a line of dead cowboys, and one of the men suggested that, since they no longer needed their boots, we could have the heels from them for our boots. I looked down at my boots and saw they needed new heels.

So as the men proceeded to take the heels from the dead men’s boots, I went upstairs to watch from the gallery.

All of a sudden, I was attacked by two women who said they wanted my nice little gold earrings! I tried to fight them off, but I could not prevail, and as one of them thrust some kind of metal spike towards my face, I woke up in a panic.

What does it mean? Whatever could have taken me to such a bizarre scenario?! Nothing I have read or watched recently comes remotely close to this scene.

As it turns out, I have indigestion, so my dinner may be the culprit. But why this dream? Where do they come from?

Out in the cold, dark night

So here we are, almost nine weeks after moving out of our rented house, from which we were being evicted, into the brand spanking new housing association property. Minus the mold and the awful landlord and letting agents, but also minus carpets and curtains, the gardens, the fabulous view and minus the dining room, the built-in wardrobes. (We’re also still waiting for our deposit to bé returned) I could go on, but I’m trying not to dwell on the negatives.

One negative I am really struggling with though is the lack of landline phone and internet. Thank God for my mobile phone, but it is costing me almost as much to run this mobile as our only phone and internet source as it was to run broadband and wifi for the whole house before.

Nine weeks is long enough, don’t you think? If I had a choice not to use BT I would certainly vote with my feet, but of course they rely on your inability to go to anybody else for a landline.

I have been through a few traumatic events in the last few years, so in one way I’m used to it, but in another, I feel battle-worn and weary, traumatised too many times.

I’m basically middle-aged now. I thought that by now we would have a stable, comfortable home with a stable, comfortable network of friends and family around us. Nothing could bé further from the truth.

Needless to say, my health has taken a turn for the worse in the last few weeks, to the extent that – apart from a few necessary errands – I am mostly needing to lay down in bed in my room. Even sitting up is too painful, my neck feels unable to hold my head up for long.

I had a conversation on Saturday morning with a pentecostal friend, and I mentioned my ill health, so she said a prayer online which she asked me to agree to, which I did, but then she said “Now we have done ‘spiritual warfare’ and you are healed. Don’t invite back the spirit of infirmity.”

I have spent some time in pentecostal churches, so it shouldn’t have surprised me but I was taken aback. If only life were that simple!

The problem with having such a simplistic worldview is that it becomes inevitably judgemental – if you don’t get well, if your circumstances don’t improve, you must have failed in some way, failed to adequately wage spiritual warfare, had a lack of faith, spoken negative words to “invite” negativity back into your life! (Remember the ‘Secret’?)

Unfortunately, unless you want a potentially self-defeating argument, you learn to have to watch what you say around people with this kind of thinking. I feel another sense of loss that I can’t trust this friend with my true thoughts and feelings.

Anyway, our big news is that, in view of our circumstances, in view of my health, our finances, my husband’s age (over 50 now), we don’t intend to pursue adoption.

That decision comes with another terrific sense of loss and grief and guilt, but we left it too late I think. I wish we had looked into it ten years ago, but on the other hand it would not have been good to put adopted children through what we have been through in the last few years. It looks like it just wasn’t meant to bé. (Either that, or I didn’t wage enough spiritual warfare. Joke.) 😦

I dreamt last night that there were a bunch of children that weren’t mine out in the shed, out in the wet cold night, and one of them broke into the house and threatened me with a gun. Somehow I knew that they were out there, and I was more shocked that I hadn’t let them in than that this child was standing in front of me with a gun. Dreams are stupid, but I expect that’s the guilt talking. I would let you in, but I don’t think I would bé very much good for you.